TheOfficeisms for episode Booze Cruise:Michael takes the entire Dunder-Mufflin staff on a motivational cruise aboard a party boat on Lake Wallenpaupack, but his planned presentation is bogged down by numerous distractions, including a dance contest, limbo, snorkel shots, and the pushy Captain Jack. Also, Jim and Katy's relationship hits the rocks as Roy and Pam finally set a wedding date, which does more than disappoint Jim, and by the end of the night, Michael's motivational cruise doesn't go completely to waste when he shares a heart-to-heart with one of the workers.Michael: Now, on this ship that is the office, what is a sales department? Anyone? Darryl: How about the sales department is the sails? Michael: Yes, Darryl, the sales department makes sales. Good. Captain Jack: But I'm not only your ship's captain, I'm also your party captain! Michael: Yeah, I'm your party captain too! Captain Jack: Michael, please... Michael: And we are gonna rock it! Captain Jack: If you would just... Michael: You are gonna put on your dancin' shoes later on! If the boat's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'! Jim: To tell you the truth, I used to have a big thing for Pam. So... Michael: Really. You're kidding me. You and Pam? Wow. I would have never put you two together. You really hid it well. God. I usually have a radar for stuff like that. (pauses) You know, I made out with Jan... Jim: Yeah I know. Michael: Yeah. Yup. (pauses) Well Pam is cute. Jim: Yeah. She's really funny. She's warm and she's just... nevermind. Michael: Well if you like her so much, you should... Don't give up. Jim: She's engaged. Michael: Pssh. BFD. Engaged ain't married. Jim: Huh. Michael: Never ever ever ever give up. Jim: What happened to you? Michael: (showing his tied-up hands) Captain Jack has a problem with authority. Jim: Oh, right, 'cause you announced that his ship was sinking. Michael: He just totally lost it. If you ask me he caused the panic. Michael: Dancing... is... a primitive art-form... used in ancient times to express oneself with... the body! And communicate! Captain Jack: Suppose your office building is on fire. Jim, who would you save? Jim: Uh, phoo...the customer...(trailing off) because the customer is king. Michael: Not what I was looking for, but a good thought. Captain Jack: He's just sucking up. Roy: (clearly drunk) When you were in the Navy, did you ever almost die? Captain Jack: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And I wasn't thinking about some customer. I was thinking about my first wife. The day I got back on shore, I married her. Jim: (to the camera as he walks away) You know what? I would save the receptionist. Just wanted to clear that up. Dwight: Don't worry, Michael. I'm taking us to shore. Michael: It's a fake wheel, dummy. Pam: Last week, Michael sent out this mysterious memo. Jim: It's time for our first quarter comradery event, so pack a swimsuit, a toothbrush, rubber soled shoes, and a ski mask. Pam: A ski mask, and a swimsuit! Jim:: So that he can have us rob a bank, and then, escape through the sewers. Pam: And brush our teeth! Katy: (Looking in at Pam and Roy dancing after Roy announces their wedding date) Do you think that will ever be us? Jim: No. Katy: What is your problem? Why did you even bring me here? Jim: I don't know. (Pauses) We should break up. Michael: What is the deal with the guy jumping overboard? If he had just waited, and listened to what I had to say, he would be motivated right now, and not all wet. Michael: I don't wanna take credit for this, but Roy and I were just having a conversation about making choices and making commitments. Did I motivate you? Roy: No, it was Captain Jack! Captain Jack: (To Roy and Pam) I could marry you right now as Captain of this ship. Michael: I could marry you as Regional Manager of Dunder-Mifflin. Michael: Sometimes you have to take a break from being the kind of boss who's always trying to teach people things. Sometimes you just have to be the boss of dancing. Michael: I see the sales department as the furnace. Phyllis: The furnace? Jim: How old is this ship? Pam: How about the anchor? Michael: I'm a great motivational speaker - I attended a Tony Robbins event by the airport last year, and...it wasn't the actual course - you had to pay for the actual course - but it talked about the actual course. Captain Jack: Actually, I'm the skipper. But you can be Gilligan. Michael: Oh God no, I'd rather die! Michael: Okay, don't spoil it for everyone, but we are going on a booze cruise on Lake Wallenpaupack. Stanley: In January? Michael: It's cheaper. Dwight: Are you sick? Captain Jack says you should look at the moon. Michael: Captain Jack's a fart face. Katy: (To Jim, Roy, and Pam) You guys...it's like we're in high school and we're at the cool table. Pam: (To Katy) I've been engaged for three years, and there's no end in sight, so you don't wanna ask my advice. Captain Jack: The coast gaurd requires me to let you know the safety exits. On this boat, it's really easy - anywhere over the side. Phyllis: (About Titanic) Michael, everyone in the engine room drowned. Michael: Thank you, spoiler! Alert! Oscar: Last year, Michael's theme was "Bowl Over the Competition." So guess where we went... Michael: It's a booze cruise! Meredith: All right! Michael: Her name is Brenda...(Pauses)...something, and she is from corporate. Michael: Leader...ship. The word "ship" is hidden inside the word "leadership"...as its derivation. Dwight: I was the youngest pilot in Pan Am history. When I was four, the pilot let me ride in the cockpit and fly the plane with him. And I was four and I was great. And I would have landed it but my dad wanted us to go back to our seats. Captain Jack: It's time to limbo, limbo, limbo! All right, I need a volunteer to come up here and hold my stick. Huh? Who's it going to be? Dwight: (Pushing Meredith aside) Me! Me, me, me, me... Captain Jack: Uhh, usually it's a woman. Dwight: I'm stronger. Michael: I'm on medication Brenda: Really? What? Michael: Vomicilin Michael: Who saw the movie Titanic? They were very important in the movie Titanic. Who saw it? Show of hands. Jim: I'm not really sure what movie you're talking about. Are you sure you got the title right? Michael: Titanic! Pam: I think you're thinking of The Hunt For Red October. Michael: No! Leo Dicaprio! Come on! Notice something that's missing from this episode? Add It Is there an error that we overlooked? Suggest a Correction |
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