TheOfficeisms for episode The Hot Girl:When an attractive woman, Katy, comes to the office to solicit her purses, all of the male staffers vie for her affection. Pam struggles with whether or not to be jealous of Katy's attention.(to Jim about the hot saleswoman, Katy) Roy: I'd be all over that if I wasn't dating Pam. Pam: We're not dating, we're engaged. Jim: Pam and I are good buddies. I'm sort-of Pam's go-to guy for her problems. You know, with stuff like work, or uh, her fiancee Roy, or uh - (thinking of a third problem) Jim: nope those are pretty much her only two problems. Michael: All right girls, break it up, you're being infiltrated. Cock in the hen house. Dwight: Cocks in the hen house. Michael: Don't say cocks. Pam: It's nice having Katy around. It's another person for Michael to um, interact with. Michael: What's the um, saying once they're laughing, there, that's. Once they're laughing that's 50% of them being horizontal. So. Not that I'm- I'm just- Not that that's my... that's what I'm trying to do but I think it helps. It kind of melts the ice. Breaks the ice. Melts. Breaks the ice and melts them. Melts their hearts. Kevin: Well, what is your type? Jim : Moms, primarily. Yup, soccer moms, single moms, NASCAR moms. Any type of mom really. Roy : That's disgusting. Kevin : Stay away from my mom. Jim : Too late Kev. Michael: I live by one rule. No office romances. No way, very messy, inappropriate, no. But...I live by another rule. Just do it. Nike. Michael: Do I have a special someone? Well, yeah of course. A bunch of them. My employees. If I had to choose between a one-night stand with some stupid cow I'd pick up at a bar, and these people, I'd pick them every time. Because with them, it is an every-day stand and I still know their names in the morning. Kevin: So, are you jealous 'cause there's another girl around? Pam: No. Kevin: She's prettier than you, though. (Michael is showing Katy around and tries to interrupt Oscar) Oscar: I'm on the phone. Michael: Oh, ooh, ooh, Oscar the grouch. Right? I thought of that. Yeah. Katy: That was on Sesame Street. Michael: I know, I know, I know... I made the connection. Can you believe he'd never heard that before he worked here? Roy: (about Katy) Why don't you get on that? Jim: She's not really my type. Roy: What are you, gay? Jim: (thinks about it) I don't think so, nope. Dwight: The purse girl hits everything on my checklist: creamy skin, straight teeth, curly hair, amazing breasts. Not for me, for my children. The Schrutes produce very thirsty babies. Michael: Coffee is the great incentivizer in the office. It's a drug. It is quite literally a drug, that speeds people up. It's not the only drug that speeds people up. You hear stories about Dunder-Mifflin in the eighties before everybody knew how bad cocaine was. Gah, man, did they move paper! Ryan: (cleaning out Michael's car) What about this bottle of power drink? Michael: What flavor? Ryan: Blue. Michael: Blue's not a flavor. Ryan: It says, "Flavor: Blue Blast." Michael: Ooh, Blue Blast! Yes, put that in the trunk. Pam: Michael. Michael: Pam! Pam: Hey, there's- Michael: Burger with cheese! Pam: There's a person here- Michael: And fries! Pam: There's a- Michael: And shake! What, go ahead. (Pause) Pam: There's a person here who wants to sell handbags. Michael: No, no, no. No vendors in the office, that is a distraction. Pam: Okay, I told her you'd talk to her, at least. Michael: Pam, Pam, come on, I'm busy. So just tell her to go away. Pam: Okay. (Pam leaves. Michael sees the "hot girl") Michael: Alright, I'll talk to her. Jan: We've created an incentive program to increase sales. At the end of the month, you can reward your top seller with a prize worth up to a thousand dollars. Michael: Whoa, how-de-ho, wow, a thousand big ones. That's cool. Do I, uh, do I get to pick the prize? Jan: Uh, yes, yes, you can. Michael: Um, question. Does top salesman include, uh, people who were at one time, ah, such outstanding salesman that they've been promoted to- Jan: No, Michael, no, you-you can't win this prize. (Pause) Michael: I didn't mean me. Michael: Wow, look at you. You are a…You’re like the new and improved Pam. Pam 6.0. Michael: First we have to do is figure out what motivates people more than anything else. Dwight: Sex. Michael: It’s illegal, can’t do that, next best thing? Dwight: Torture. Michael: Da, come on Dwight, help me out here, that’s just stupid. Notice something that's missing from this episode? Add It Is there an error that we overlooked? Suggest a Correction |
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